Serving Arizona State University Online Since 1995  Current Issue: Thursday, September 22, 2005





Top 5: Worst ways to break up with your significant other

 published on Thursday, September 22, 2005


1. Switch Teams:

"I'm sorry, but I'm (insert opposite sexual orientation here)."

2. Be Passive Aggressive:

Leave an away message up that says, "It's not you, it's me."

3. Imitate Your Favorite Commercial:

"The bad news is: I slept with your sister. The good news is: I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by switching to Geico."

4. Use Everyone's Favorite Technology:

Cancel your relationship with your significant other on Facebook.

5. Be Super Suave:

"I think we should just be friends. So now that we're friends, can I have your best friend's phone number?"

Disclaimer: SPM doesn't advocate these break-up techniques. It's better to end things like a grown-up. But hey, if you're a total wuss, one of these might be just what you need.

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