Serving Arizona State University Online Since 1995  Current Issue: Wednesday, April 24, 2002





Editorial: Club sports deserve proper recognition
With a campus that has a student population hovering around 50,000 and a heavy slate of sports that includes 22 varsity teams, club sports have taken a back seat at ASU.

Opinion: Chinese men and seals know Viagra should be deregulated
The three most common ingredients in jokes are Viagra, a Chinese man and seal penises. God bless reality for converging these three crucial elements in my life.

Opinion: 'Pretty lights' can't solve Mesa's problems
I conducted an experiment that isn't remotely scientific but useful nonetheless. My goal was to compare the number of what I'll call "quick cash" stores on roads around the Valley.

Opinion: Gates, Clarke unsung heroes in a pessimist's world
Things used to be so easy. It used to be that a hero would come riding over the hills, wearing bright, shiny armor, ready to do battle with a terrible dragon that threatened the local village.

Hump Day Hoopla: Miller still snubbed despite successes
Dear Commissioner Bud Selig and Donald Fehr, Let me congratulate you on your success with your plans of contraction and how it would "save" baseball. I must also congratulate you for not giving any recognition to the best team in the majors the Arizona Diamondbacks.

Sun Devils begin road swing
While it's not the first time the Sun Devils (25-15, 9-6 Pac-10) have met the Sooners this spring, they are probably glad it's the last. Oklahoma (24-16, 8-7 Big 12) won two of three games against ASU in mid-March at HoHoKam Park, racking up 29 hits in the series.

Crandall released from hospital, will begin three-month recovery
The ASU sophomore guard was released from the hospital Tuesday night, just hours after being sedated with a pair killer. Crandall had been confined to a hospital bed since last Wednesday following surgery to repair a broke fibula just above his right ankle.

Devils win final game, finish season 10-17
The ASU water polo team wrapped up its inaugural season last weekend by splitting a pair of games in San Bernardino, Calif. The Sun Devils (10-17) dropped a 6-5 decision to Cal State San Bernardino in the opener, before handing Chapman a 12-2 thrashing in the second game of a doubleheader.

Five former Devils sign contracts
Guard Marquise Muldrow, wide receiver Donnie O'Neal, punter Nick Murphy, tailback Tom Pace and running back Delvon Flowers all signed free agent contracts Monday, allowing each a chance to showcase their abilities this summer in training camp and possibly in the upcoming season.

ASU moves into fourth place
The ASU women's golf team jumped two spots on the leader board to fourth place in the Pac-10 Championships after firing a 13-over 305 in Tuesday's second round at the Walla Walla Country Club in Walla Walla, Wash.

Ex-officer gets 6 months in jail for student's death
A former Department of Public Safety officer was sentenced Tuesday to six months in jail for killing an ASU student during while pursuing another vehicle.

Group proposes reducing Mill Avenue to 1 lane each way
DTC, the non-profit group that manages, promotes and represents the downtown district and its businesses, hopes these changes will give downtown a more pedestrian-friendly atmosphere.

Cinema moves out for credit union expansion
The answer is probably no. Attendance at the MU's movie theater has been tapering off for years, and because of old equipment, no films have been shown in the last few semesters.

Nearly $3,000 cut in diversity programming
A three-hour Associated Students of ASU budget hearing on Tuesday night concluded with a cutback of $2,785 in the Diversity Awareness Programming Board fund.

ASU's Geological Sciences department is having a colloquium speaker, Dr. David Des Marais of NASA-Ames will speak on the early evolution of the biogeochemical carbon cycles at 3:40 p.m. in PSF-101. There will be a reception at 3:15 p.m. in the Geology Museum.

Endowment awards outstanding teachers
To do this, Teets, chairman and CEO of JW Teets Enterprises LLC, set up an endowment fund in 1999. Last Friday, three professors from the ASU College of Business were awarded the John Teets Outstanding Teaching Awards.

ASASU calls for ASA director's resignation
The Associated Students of ASU passed a bill Tuesday calling for the resignation of the Arizona Students' Association director who was unaware of the Senate's dissatisfaction.

The gender gap: Despite efforts for equity, women professors still earn less than men at ASU
Hitt and Koblitz began their teaching careers outside of Arizona, forging names for themselves in their respective fields. They say they love working with students and the opportunity to conduct research. Both are full professors at ASU.

Police Beat
A 39-year-old woman was arrested on charges of trespassing and disorderly conduct after she was asked repeated times to leave Tempe St. Luke Hospital and refused.

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Trailer trash, foul mouths meet Macbeth in 'Scotland, PA'
In Scotland, PA, the new Shakespeare reworking that hits theaters tomorrow, star Maura Tierney gingerly dashes through the alphabet on the letter "f" alone.

Old school skating comes alive with 'Dogtown'
The rugged story of skateboarding's original urban assault team, which is given revered attention in the gnarly documentary Dogtown and Z-Boys, was almost left untold.

Status woe
Penn Roullier took out his business card, placed it on top of the glass table positioned in front of the cheetah-print couch we lounged upon, and with the flick of his wrist, opened the gate into a world of debauchery and drunkenness, status and silicone.

Gay pride festival features first ASU gay fraternity
Dottie, in drag, who was crowned Miss Gay Pride 2002, sashayed the grounds, greeting her fans in a red mini-dress, platform shoes and extra-long black eyelashes, from beneath a yellow sun umbrella.

Slow Poke punk more than its piercings
The local group Slow Poke can best be described as a Blink 182 in training. Something tells me they may even be prone to getting naked at shows, but who knows? You'll have to find that one out for yourself.

Eclectic budding Valley band begs for wontons
Ask local band Pomagic what they want out of life and each of its four members will give you a different answer. Individually, they want cheese-crisps, groupies, a lifetime supply of Mary Kay products and pineapple wontons, but as a group, they have one answer in common.

Lisa Loeb having her cake, and pie, and eating it too
Her new album Cake and Pie has more of a rocking guitar sound but never loses Loeb's uniquely mellow style, soothing voice or musical meanings.

Hometown heroes return after eating up the world
Chances are the person you're talking to will swear that they used to play in the sandbox with the lead singer Jim Adkins, did a science project with Zach Lind, the drummer, in the third grade or went to the prom with guitarist Tom Linton's best friend's cousin.

Puppet man more than some wood and a hand
Boys and dolls don't typically mix. But that wasn't the case for ventriloquist and comedian Jeff Dunham, who breathed life into a few puppets when he was a child.

Very important bowwow wowed by VIP rooms
Some of you might recognize me from my previous column in this fine quality of a magazine (which I make a point never to aim my urine on), or from such adult canine cinema classics as Doggie Does Dallas and All Dogs Cum to Heaven.

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